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*1. I was on TV before I was born ~ TRUE...my mom was a spokeswoman for a car dealership in Louisiana while she was pregnant with me *2. I worked in a Convalescent Center when I was in 9th Grade ~ TRUE...my best friend's mom at the time worked as a Secretary there so we were there almost every single day after school *3. My friend helped artificially inseminate a dog ~ TRUE...my friend Alnee loooves cho puppies and is aspiring to be a Vet...and she actually helped...get...the baby...makin...on...yes, we even told her to please not go into deal after that *4. My friends and I were propositioned by performers in the Hard Knock Life tour at my 16th Birthday Party ~ TRUE...lol about 8 friends and I stayed at a Hotel for my birthday and they were there at the same time...they would knock on our door and offer to smoke up with us and call our room asking for us to send down any 4 of us for some fun...it was annoying but we felt *cool* although we were really afraid to go anywhere with them...we got autographs but i have no clue where they are now...we were across the hall from their hotel room and there were strippers in there cause there was this LINE of guys outside the door...i just remember walking downstairs and this mass group of men walked up and hugged me and said happy birthday...scary at first but a sincerely sweet sentiment...and i swear we saw Ja Rule, Jay-Z..and Method Man...i have a weird little story about Method Man but that'll bore you guys if I go into it right here so if you wanna know, IM my booty *5. I enjoyed Spam in my younger years ~ TRUE...I WAS THE SPAM QUEEN, MAMA...i loved it when i went to preschool *6. My mom was engaged to Ron Popeil ~ TRUE...they were engaged a LONG time ago...she was also engaged to this one guy that used to be on Magnum P.I., his name was Larry Manetti I think *7. We've had a pet rat before ~ TRUE...we had found it and felt far too guilty to give it away *8. I once owned a penny worth $10,000 ~ TRUE...when I was about 3 or 4, I swallowed a penny while doing a magic show for my cats so I was rushed to the Emergency Room...and although they were more than hesitant to check it out, they finally did and the penny was stuck in my esophagus, which means I could have easily died...and the surgery for the penny cost about that and my parents gave it to me so I could bring it to Show-N-Tell...but the bright child I am put it in a cup with other pennies in it so...bon voyage el penny <3 *9. I go skiing about every 5 years ~ FALSE...ah ha!! so that's the phoney mofo...I broke my leg when I was in 4th Grade so since then...it hasnt been an urge of mine to go skiing *10. I've had a crush on Morgan Freeman in the past ~ TRUE..it was more like I was in awe of him and his abilities...he seems like an amazing man i am feeling...:  crazy
ringing in my ears: "Take Me Under" ~ 3 Days Grace
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Truth or MythI stole this sucker long ago and i've decided to bring it back into play...the point is to personally write 9 things about yourself that is true, and one that isnt...so out of these 10 factoids about, 9 will be true and 1 shall be false...you, as the reader...shall determine which is the false mofo...and please to everyone that reads this, guess...I wanna see if I was incredibly obvious or a bit of a stumper...andand if you already did this in the past for me and know the answer then shoosh yoself, cheaterheads!~* :o...i think yall should do this too on yours but it's entirely up to you...god speed <3 *1. I was on TV before I was born *2. I worked in a Convalescent Center when I was in 9th Grade *3. My friend helped artificially inseminate a dog *4. My friends and I were propositioned by performers in the Hard Knock Life tour at my 16th Birthday Party *5. I enjoyed Spam in my younger years *6. My mom was engaged to Ron Popeil {see http://shop.ronco.com/} *7. We've had a pet rat before *8. I once owned a penny worth $10,000 *9. I go skiing about every 5 years *10. I've had a crush on Morgan Freeman in the past i am feeling...:  intimidated
ringing in my ears: "Brightest" ~ Copeland
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*you'll never know the meaning of your eyes...WOAH THERE BUCKO...THAT CAPTIVATE GIRL? WHO THE CRAP IS SHE AGAIN? well it's Crystal...i'm actually updating or attempting to...i haven't really had my mind working as well as i'd like to have it be...but i'm hoping this works...why do we even waste the time to get scared sometimes? there are always inevitable times...we are born...we will die *which seems to be a greater fear than most*...we will feel emotion of some kind...we will let people down...we will have a moment to shine...with that, we all have different roads...some say a high road can be an option...but i don't think we're necessarily meant to be what is instilled in us...i do agree that we can plainly see and tend to embrace what we may have dealt with or noticed in our younger years...but it seems to give into that is something lesser than we could do...there is a greater being inside all of us that we may not even fully reach until our time has almost dwindled...that sigh of relief that can only come when everything is right for about 3 seconds...we all seem to take on a role, whether we intend to or not...and while the lines get hazed as to which we may all be...each one can blend together at one point or another...because as a whole, we are all capable of absolutely anything...i'm not saying we all have the same levels of talent in the same specific categories...or we all have the wit and timing of robin williams...or the instincts and smarts as Einstein...but there are things in all of us that just go together and makes us so much more alike than we believe possible...i think it's important that we're all different or we'd all get completely bored and find one another dull...there's a creativity in all of us that can reach someone that no one could before...i'm not saying we will all like one another or adore each other's work, whatever it may be...that's why there's such thing as an opinion...a vantage point that actually has something behind it aside from 'yah, just don't like it'...but we have to give it that chance...that one heeve-ho to make sure we won't regret it or find differently...because we're just odd folk...we really are...we are happy when it rains but then if there's too much rain, no way jose...the summer brings out the joy but then it can make someone madder than a bull wearing a tutu...people either find too much of one thing...or not enough of another...maybe there's no use in satisfying ourselves because there's no way to...but i think that could be a beauty part...it means we are never completely done...we know there is something more...we don't just accept things as they are...and if we do, we know it's for the better...we are the little boy that gets pelted by that baseball 3593 times and ends up taking T-ball just cause he likes the little shoes that he wore prior...even if we don't think highly of ourselves, we strive for something bigger than what we have...and maybe that proves the love for who we are in itself...the love that we will never allow to rise to the surface...as Whitney Houston says, "The greatest love of all"...and nosuh, she doesn't mean her crack :D
^}*{^
*Crystal's Odd Question of the Day ~ What would you like to have done/be by this time next year?
^}*{^
*i'm sorry for these lapses of writing...sometimes my thoughts don't always even make something worth mentionable and i'd rather not strain your eyes with my own hopeless babblings of an itchy-nosed 20 year old who wishes she could be greater...i've always worked on something about myself and i wonder if that's good or bad...it may have results but i'm always that much more difficult on who i am...so i'd like to know...how are YOU and what do you want to change or NEVER change about yourself, deary?i am feeling...:  energetic
ringing in my ears: "The Good Witch of the North" ~ Everclear
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*can you feel me in your arms holding my last breath? safe inside myself are all my thoughts of you...concepts of meanings and spaces are always quite strung together...there are always the possibilities of things that completely suck the romanticism out of the moment or complete situation...such as, fate...some people believe there is such a thing...a predestined plan that lures people or instances to in corresponding occurdence...it's just meant to happen...without being able to fight it or not...which brings the whole understanding and definition of destiny: 1 : something to which a person or thing is destined : FORTUNE ~ 2 : a predetermined course of events often held to be an irresistible power or agency...but then there's a completely opposite side of this said happening...which is what some call being realistic...just...accepting them as they come and not necessarily looking deeper unless given a reason to do so or some kind of proof...so here is realism: 1 : concern for fact or reality and rejection of the impractical and visionary...while i may be a huge romantic in more aspects than most...i guess in using my overthinking mannerisms to sink deeper into these meanings, i kind of came up with my own alternative theory...maybe to be happier person, you have to contain both of these complete polar opposite outlooks...and here is why...if you believed everything was destined, what is the need to try at anything? there'd be no reason to...you'd sit and wait for life to happen to you as opposed to you creating your own world in which other people are apart of...but if you believed in pure realism, you wouldn't necessarily be open to believing things could last forever or last at all...you would take it as far as you felt it would go and let go when you assumed it was getting too involved...because why? more likely, fear...a fear of being wrong in this whole reality-based understanding of a world that can be cruel that you finally accepted...but there are times in both the world of a dreamer and realist that completely force you to see the other's side of the spectrum...say in being the rose-colored flower smelling world, this amazing relationship you have built your entire being around comes crashing down...in a moment's time, you become the realist...because you see the end...and as badly as you want to see reconcilliation, it seems out of sight and touch or even slight reach...so you're boggled and completely question all of your beliefs to be true...whereas in the all-controlled realist is to fall in love...i'm sure it brings a question to all of the supposed learnings...it's as though maybe there is finally something to this whole soul mate or possible forever partner thing...maybe it doesn't all end...the basic thread is that people are shaped by their situations and their capability of taking it in...i don't think it's possible to say you're either a realist or a romantic without having atleast a bit of both inside of you...because without the light, there is no dark...with taking a risk, there is fear...and with suceeding, there is accomplishment...it could only be that it's easier to understand something in others once dealing with it yourself...but it's nice to think we're all the same, no matter how different we'd like to think we are
l{*}I
*Crystal's Odd Question of the Day ~ Are you more of a realist or a dreamer and how/why do you think that is?
l{*}I
*i think i have a urinary tract infection..if any of you have any kind of remedies i can use before having to suck up my whineyness and go to the Doctor, please share...and DON'T say cranberry juice cause it makes it worse...i figured it would work like a charm but apparently not...what penises...do you notice you never try to search your mind and figure out how the good things happened in your life? we rarely even go back to those memories except to find a reason to miss something...why is it that the bad times and bad comments toward us are the ones that stick? sure, we sometimes use them to better ourselves but can you honestly say you've taken every negative statement and turned it into a positive or are you like a regular person and either pondered over it silently or were slightly offended? it's as though we need explanations for the bad deck of cards but the good hand is completely forgotten in a short period of time...even the most optomistic people deal with that...the times of nostalgia can bring out so much joy but people choose to think of it as 'whywhywhy'...well...why NOT...why not attempt to have as much fun as you used to...sure, you were worry free and didn't think of much in the times where the joy couldn't even be covered up by the darkest sky...but when you get older, you learn you have to work towards things in order for them to work...you have to work at everything...because things take time and devotion...but with fun, you just have to allow yourself that moment of forgetfulness...because if you keep all the negatives on your mind, you'll have a quarter of the laughs when you're trying to give yourself a break...but back to the original thought, why don't we disect the good times? we don't sit there when we're in the most giggly relationship and trace back every step to find out why someone loves us...we accept it and smile on the moments that proved so many things without even a slight attempt...maybe our most joyful moments are when we don't think about things too much...because then you can't find the flaws like we sometimes tend to do in order to bring reality's slap-happy viewi am feeling...:  enthralled
ringing in my ears: "Our Lady of Sorrows" ~ My Chemical Romance
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*i always thought if i held you tightly, you would love me like you did back then...then I fell asleep and the city kept blinking...what was I thinking when I let you back in?...i'm going to inform you on a little secret...SO secretive that i just may have to close the binds and sneak a peek behind my back to check for spies...dundundun...we are all stubborn as the dickens...THERE...I SAID IT...the same thing that drives us as a youngster to touch that high-pitched whistling kettle despite the desperate nono's and shaking of fingers...we do it anyway...people as a whole seem to like to rebel...like fonzie in his super neato keen leather jacket and combed back hair...now it's not necessarily the same as beavis and buttheads repetitive "breaking the law" ditty...you don't have to go to those lengths to go against what is asked of you...but when my brain got to busting a move about this particular piece of information...a huge thought came to my mind: if we are rule-breakers, meaning we want to learn things on our own, then why do people completely shut down after being hurt?...no, i don't believe anyone WANTS to feel a heartbreak come their way...but at the same time, we know the risk...people can warn us about anything in the entire world but we all know we will end up doing what we feel is best in the long run...not even best...what we really want or want to give a chance to...that doesn't mean people's advice isn't welcomed and taken into consideration...there's a cautionary word others can add that makes more sense than what we mix in our own little minds...maybe we seek out our own pain at one point or another...not even intentionally or in hopes of breaking down...but why are people so filled with regret after doing something and it backfiring? it's understandable not to want to feel that pain...it doesn't mean you have to dismiss all thoughts of that specific incident or situation...it happened for a reason...and whether you want to admit it or not, you've become stronger, better and more beautiful because of it...and trust me, i know of all people that sitting with a box of kleenex as your new best friend and a face so puffed that you'd be jealous of chewbacca's good looks is not a moment where you can seek out the wonderful things in your life...but it helps to know something even greater will take a turn sometime after...you just have to wait for it...cause as soon as your mind changes or you stop searching, BOOM...there it goes...and with all these thoughts, there's a chance we should take people into consideration that we just find downright rotton or mean...there's a reason for their pain as well...maybe their walls up are so high that the clouds can't even see inside...but sometimes proving you actually care what they'd have to offer or say matters, the walls crumble down inch by inch...i really hope you're have a great day...and you find a reason to laugh...aaaaaand that someone makes you feel special =) because we all are no matter what...YES...even richard simmons...but his specialness just flows like his hair
->*<-
*Crystal's Odd Question of the Day ~ What word(s) do you hate or overuse or both?
->*<-
*i found out i'm getting a whopping 16 bucks back...oh yes...i am rolling hard...AND I AM BLINGBLINGING...you have no idea...i could go to any grocery store or pizza joint in the entire universe and come out with crazy amounts of plastic jewelry and little plastic baseball caps that are the size of barbie's heads...and i've been watching a huge amount of forensic shows before i drift off into the sandman's land...it either makes me feel like a hero or i get killed...i have really weird dreams where people morph into something else entirely...but i mean that in the strangest form imaginable...like say it goes from Christina Aguilera to a nun...yes...weird...i'm flipflopping all over the place but let's all watch forensics and hold handsi am feeling...:  pleased
ringing in my ears: "I Am Trying To Break Your Heart" ~ Wilco
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*you're the magic that holds the sky up from the ground...there's something about happy couples...people are either magnetically drawn to them or repelled like an old lady to chewy foods...in seeing a couple all gooeyed up over one another...my first feeling is happiness...because you know everyone deserves that at one time or another...even for the rest of their lives...then i have that gushy feeling of wanting to spazz but knowing it will frighten said happy couple...then, of course, there's envy...because when you're part of another happy duo, you tend not to feel jealous because you already have that...and you kinda feel consumed with that feeling 'woo there's a happy couple club and we're all part of it'...but when you lack that dynamic duo status, there's just this jealous feeling...wondering 'why don't i have that?'...then you're reminded of a time when you actually did have it...a depression comes over you and runs through your veins...and then are the questions of why...what did i do...but we all move on at some time...maybe not completely...but atleast partly...perhaps a key moment of lightbulbovertheheadness is when we're in that grieving period of having lost someone we really cared for...because when we see that happy couple, is it our one removed partner we think of...or someone that completely blindsides us all together but makes the heart go thump thump? ((yay for me watching too many movies and getting these ideas aka Whatever it Takes...woo for the teen scenes)) which is when true feelings come out...and maybe movies aren't just movies...it's those moments we choose to capture that happen rarely but we've been given the opportunity to store it up in a matter of 120 minutes...cause through that movie, there's always a lesson or realization or else there'd be no plot...+++read this part, if ANY+++ i heard a very articulate quote today all relationships are vulnerable, or else they wouldn't mean anything...that made me WOOOOOOOOAH outloud in the form of Joey Russo from blossom...very neat, huh? also...what the crap is it about people wanting taken people? do we release some sort of scent that others are drawn to that makes them want to put their nose in our hineys? lol okay eeeew...that was a bit much...but honestly, is there just this happiness that's emitted that is like bees to honey? our aroma must be sweeter than the sappiest song in those times... i think our biggest task to remember when people come-a-runnin' to the wanting of us is to remember what made us exude that something special that others suddenly become so attracted...it's the person you're currently with...dundundun...ADULT SWIM IS CRACKING ME THE CRAP UP...I NEED TO KNOW WHAT THIS SHOW IS...IT HAS TALKING FOOD AND VIDEO GAME PEOPLE
-_*_-
*Crystal's Odd Question of the Day ~ Write a personal ad as to what you're looking for in life/a person and give a brief synopsis of who you are in it
-_*_-
*well...a few notsogood things have happened...fights and arguments...lack of this and that...do you ever feel at a standstill and you don't want to be the one to change it? but hey, it's my life...you know what's weird? people get all shocked each and every time i cuss...even some people that have heard me say things 35093 times...i think it's cause i have this little voice that either reminds you of barry white or a popple...and well, i don't like cussing all that much...it's actually a habit i want to break...but i've been doing nothing but fighting the past couple of days it seems...either people assuming things or just getting fed up...and i hate fighting...so pluh...but i may be moving back to Louisiana...my pawpaw almost passed away and my dad's business isn't doing well at all...i found out one of my best friends from my younger years has Cancer...it made my heart drop...we had these little ninja turtle and pirate parties at her house...she was so unique from everyone else...she had this fiery red hair and this smile that was permanant...and she was as quick as a bunny...so smart...i feel awful...and i feel frozen as what to do cause i don't think i've even spoken to her in atleast 5 years...i want to go to her but i don't want it to seem like the only reason i've ever cared...cause if it was, i wouldn't remember so many things about her...i realized some things lately from my childhood that i hadn't really noticed before and it makes sense as to why i am the way i am about some things...and it scares me that they happened...eh...someone said a great quote "life's best moments are in the outtakes"...it's so true...the moments where everything gets messed up but you find the humor in it...it's where we grow character and we're able to breathe a little easier...and in seeing One Hour Photo (which i didnt really enjoy that much), there were key things said...such as, the moments we decide to capture in photographs aren't the important ones at all...it's just the moments we want to remember as happiness came along with them...and it asked why don't people take pictures of things that happen in everyday life that, in truth, speak of what really goes on in our life? like the door knob we have trouble jiggling...or the cricket that keeps us up late at night...the showerhead that never pays attention to massage or high speed...just the little things...because if we believe the little things count in a relationship, why not everyday life?i am feeling...:  bored
ringing in my ears: "Sparks" ~ Coldplay
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captivate's journal
go home ~>
lonely
calm